Generally, a considerable amount of thought goes into the decision to end a marriage. If you have made that decision, however, it is now time to think about the legal process that follows. Before you initiate the divorce process, it helps to get some idea what to expect and manage your expectations. Toward that end, a Murfreesboro divorce attorney at Bennett, Michael & Hornsby discusses five things you should know if you are planning to divorce.
- Do not go into the process expecting to “win.” If you are at the point that divorce is inevitable, there may be a significant amount of acrimony and tension between you and your spouse. If so, it may be tempting to go into the divorce process with a competitive, adversarial attitude. Like many people, you may think in terms of “winning” your divorce case. If so, try not to approach your divorce expecting to “win.” First, divorce can be emotionally exhausting which can take any pleasure you might get out of “winning.” More importantly, given the complex nature of divorce, it is unusual for either spouse to get everything they want out of the process. Consequently, there is rarely a “winner.” Instead of going into the process trying to win, consider how that attitude will impact everyone involved in the process, including children.
- Determining what your priorities are before filing is important. While it is possible to have a simple divorce that does not involve any disputed issues, most divorces are more complex and more contentious. Before beginning the process, take some time to decide what your priorities are. Is remaining in the marital residence crucial or would you prefer your share of the equity? What assets do you feel strongest about keeping and which ones are you willing to let go? If you have minor children, will parenting time with the children be a major issue or are you fine with shared parenting time? Have you considered if you will be paying or receiving child support or alimony?
- Do not make this your children’s divorce. It is virtually impossible for children not to feel the impact of their parent’s divorce. On the other hand, you can do a lot to make the experience less stressful for them. While they are undoubtedly part of the divorce, it is not their divorce. Resist the urge to discuss details of the divorce with them and do not bad mouth their other parent. Not only can this cause long-lasting psychological trauma to your kids, but it can also work against you in court.
- Do not turn to other divorced friends for advice. As soon as family, friends, and even co-workers learn that you are going through a divorce you can expect many of them to offer unsolicited advice. Suddenly, everyone has an opinion about your proposed marital settlement, your custody arrangements, or the amount of alimony you agreed to pay/accept. These people may be well-meaning, but every divorce involves a unique set of facts, circumstances, and parties to the divorce. Consequently, the outcome of an issue in your aunt’s divorce (for instance) may not be the same as yours because the two situations are not identical.
- An experienced divorce attorney can save you time, money, and frustration. One of your biggest worries when you decide to end your marriage may be the cost of a divorce, both in terms of time and money. That may cause you to hesitate when it comes to consulting with an attorney. In reality, however, hiring an experienced attorney early on in the divorce process is more likely to save you time and money.
Contact a Murfreesboro Divorce Attorney
If you are planning to go through the divorce process, consult with an experienced Murfreesboro divorce attorney at Bennett, Michael & Hornsby as soon as possible to discuss your legal options. Contact the team today by calling 615-898-1560 to schedule your free appointment.